The Shattering

I take a deep, ragged breath
And close my weary eyes
As my racing mind churns
And tries to maintain my fragile disguise.
This protective shell I so long ago created
To hide myself from life's cruel face
Is cracking into a myriad of jagged pieces
That each fall into an unfamiliar place.
I grasp for a well-worn hold
But instantly am repelled by its feel.
My hands no longer correctly fit
Into the grooves I've carved in steel.
For a moment, the world churns,
And I fear I am falling fast,
But a steadying force takes over
And the heady sensation has passed.
I slowly lift my heavy lids
To observe the newly-laid terrain.
I let out a shocked cry
At the changes that are so plain.
All around where I thoguht chaos would be
Is a new and gleaming place.
The beauty and brightness of it all
Makes a smile spread across my face.
I carefully turn my thoughts inward
And realize that my thick, protective wall
Has fallen victim to the onslaught-
Crumbled once and for all.
To this new and exciting world
I find myself standing totally bare.
I am without my hackneyed trapping,
But I find I no longer care.
I feel like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon
And unfurling for the first time its wings.
Standing on the edge of a new journey,
I leave behind my old ways and things.
So, this is what I bring to you now-
Myself stripped thoroughly and completely clean,
But its the real me for you to examine
As no one before has ever seen.

Lisa Rodenberry
2006